[SPARK-18700][SQL] Add StripedLock for each table's relation in cache

## What changes were proposed in this pull request?

As the scenario describe in [SPARK-18700](https://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/SPARK-18700), when cachedDataSourceTables invalided, the coming few queries will fetch all FileStatus in listLeafFiles function. In the condition of table has many partitions, these jobs will occupy much memory of driver finally may cause driver OOM.

In this patch, add StripedLock for each table's relation in cache not for the whole cachedDataSourceTables, each table's load cache operation protected by it.

## How was this patch tested?

Add a multi-thread access table test in `PartitionedTablePerfStatsSuite` and check it only loading once using metrics in `HiveCatalogMetrics`

Author: xuanyuanking <xyliyuanjian@gmail.com>

Closes #16135 from xuanyuanking/SPARK-18700.